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Everybody loves to receive a thank you card and have their effort appreciated. Unfortunately, writing wedding thank you cards can seem like a chore – something you `have` to do. It is an overwhelming task, trying to make hundreds of notes sound heartfelt and grateful! However, with a little bit of planning and the right tools at hand the process can actually be a fun extension of the excitement of wedding invitation planning. Here is your guide to making post-wedding thank you messages painless.
No matter how big or small your wedding, it is inevitable that a lot of people will have contributed in a lot of different ways to make it happen. It’s only polite to thank these people for their love, support and hard work in the lead-up to the big day (and for all those years before!). This is not just a social nicety either. You will likely be overwhelmed by the love your friends and family show, and eager to have the opportunity to show your gratitude in some small way.
Like everything else wedding-related, a little bit of organization and forethought goes a long way here. Try to have your thank you cards in your hands before the wedding actually happens, as well as all the necessary details of your guests. Keep a running list of people who gave you gifts, helped with the wedding, or otherwise showed you support during this time. Note down what they did or what they gave you so that you can thank them specifically. Writing these sort of details down can feel a little bit awkward, like you’re keeping account of who was the most generous, but it’s worth pushing past the awkwardness of writing such a list to avoid an even more awkward situation: forgetting to thank somebody for something, or thanking them for the wrong gift!
You should get started on your thank you notes as soon after the wedding as possible, as they should ideally be sent out within three months of the big day. If you had a large wedding that doesn’t leave you a lot of time! It’s best to try to power through some each day to pace yourself and make sure you can give attention to each one. You can even begin to write your thank yous as gifts and calls come in before the wedding. With the right supplies, it will feel like a treat to sit down and knock out a few notes!
Now to the nitty-gritty: how do you word the things? It can seem completely overwhelming.
The trick is to ask yourself:
You want to be sure that you acknowledge all these points if they are relevant.
It is up to you whether you use formal or informal greetings and terms of address in your thank you cards. It’s usually best to base this on what your relationship is to the person in question. No need to go all formal with your good friends, but best not to be overly familiar with your Dad’s boss.
Be sure not to leave anybody out in your address – mention both names if writing to a couple, and children’s names as well for a family.
If possible, mention the name of any plus-ones who also attended the wedding.
Most importantly, check and double-check the spelling of all names! It is the height of rudeness to misspell somebody’s name because you couldn’t be bothered to make sure you had it right. A word of warning: beware of using Facebook to find the name of people you don’t know. I’ve been at weddings where people have been thanked in the wedding program by the silly name they have listed on Facebook to keep their profile hidden from employers! If you aren’t sure of somebody’s name or who they are, always ask someone who knows. This might mean speaking to your partner, parents or in-laws. Again, this extra check can save you from a lot of awkwardness later.
Here are some key words to make use of so you don’t feel like you’re repeating yourself!
Remember, even though it’s an overwhelming task, it is such a good thing that you have so much to be thankful for and so many people to thank!
Thank you cards can seem like a hassle, but they are a great opportunity to spend a little longer soaking in the love of your family and friends. The wedding day can pass so quickly that it becomes a blur! Writing your thank yous can be a fun process of reflecting on each and every person that was part of the day, and channeling all those good vibes into something tangible. Which is basically what you did to create your wedding, right? Get organised, make time, and have fun with it.
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