{"id":7532,"date":"2019-02-15T12:47:32","date_gmt":"2019-02-15T01:47:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/?p=7532"},"modified":"2026-03-31T15:05:14","modified_gmt":"2026-03-31T04:05:14","slug":"accepting-or-declining-a-wedding-invitation","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/accepting-or-declining-a-wedding-invitation\/","title":{"rendered":"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<style>\n#post-7532 .entry-content { font-size: 20px !important; line-height: 1.7 !important; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content p,\n#post-7532 .entry-content li { font-size: 20px !important; line-height: 1.7 !important; margin-bottom: 20px !important; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content h2 { text-transform: none !important; font-size: 34px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; line-height: 1.3; margin-top: 56px; margin-bottom: 16px; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content h3 { text-transform: none !important; letter-spacing: 0.5px; line-height: 1.3; font-weight: 600; margin-top: 32px; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content table { width: 100%; border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 18px; margin: 28px 0; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content th { background: #f8f6f3; padding: 12px 16px; text-align: left; border-bottom: 2px solid #ddd; }\n#post-7532 .entry-content td { padding: 10px 16px; border-bottom: 1px solid #eee; }\n<\/style>\n\n\n<p>While your response to a <strong><a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/wedding-invitations\/\">wedding invitation<\/a><\/strong> may not be as important as the bridesmaid colours or first dance song, it deserves to be done right, and the correct way can vary, depending on the situation. If you aren\u2019t sure how to reply to a wedding invitation, then continue reading to find the solution for your scenario.<\/p>\n\n&nbsp;\n\n<h2>Responding to a wedding invitation<\/h2>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/2.jpg\" alt=\"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\" class=\"wp-image-7535\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/2.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/2-640x427.jpg 640w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/2-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n<p>There is definitely such thing as a good and bad wedding\nguest. Here are some tips on returning an RSVP that will keep you in the good\nbooks of the stressed out engaged couple.<\/p>\n\n<p>It really makes planning a wedding &#8211; already a difficult task\n&#8211; harder if you have to follow people up for an RSVP, so don\u2019t be <em>that<\/em> guest. Beware, if you are too slack\nwith responding, you might not get a follow up email &#8211; you may just get cut\nfrom the list with an email or no notice at all! <\/p>\n\n<p>Bonus good guest tip: never just show up to a wedding that you haven\u2019t RSVP\u2019d to. Your friendship with the wedding couple might struggle to recover from that awkward situation.<\/p>\n\n&nbsp;\n\n<h2>Accepting a wedding invitation<\/h2>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1080\" height=\"608\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/3.jpg\" alt=\"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\" class=\"wp-image-7536\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/3.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/3-640x360.jpg 640w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/3-768x432.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n<p>Your response to a wedding invitation depends on the method\nchosen by the couple. We cover the alternative ways later in the article, but\nfor accepting in the traditional manner &#8211; with an RSVP card that is included in\nthe invitation suite &#8211; it\u2019s as simple as \u2018fill and send\u2019.<\/p>\n\n<p>However, here are some tips to remember:<\/p>\n\n<ul><li>Include\nthe names of every guest attending, so your host knows numbers (if replying as\na family or couple, exclude the names of anyone not attending to avoid\nconfusion, rather than ticking both boxes).<\/li><li>Be\nspecific about dietary requirements (and who they belong to, if more than one\nperson is accepting on the same card).<\/li><li>Don\u2019t\nforget to respond to any extra little details like song requests etc.<\/li><li>Respond\nearly enough to allow for postage times (especially if you live far away from\nthe couple).<\/li><\/ul>\n\n<p>The reply to a wedding invitation doesn\u2019t have to be limited to straightforward prose. Some have fun with the RSVP by using or creating their own wedding invitation acceptance poem. This can take the form of a completed poem for guests to chuckle at or &#8211; better yet &#8211; a poem on the RSVP card left with blank spaces so the guests can fill them in creatively.<\/p>\n\n&nbsp;\n\n<h2>How to decline a wedding invitation<\/h2>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/4.jpg\" alt=\"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\" class=\"wp-image-7537\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/4.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/4-640x427.jpg 640w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/4-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n<p>Declining a wedding invitation, while more simple, can\nsometimes be difficult because you don\u2019t want to hurt anyone\u2019s feelings. On a\npractical note, if it\u2019s an RSVP card, you simply tick the decline box and send\nback. That\u2019s the easy part, but if you\u2019re wondering how to say no, especially\nhow to decline a family wedding invitation, then it may require some extra\neffort and tact.<\/p>\n\n<p>If you\u2019re worried that declining the invite may cause offence, make sure you tell the couple directly (either in person or via phone) before they receive the declining RSVP, as a tick in a \u2018no\u2019 box can come across a little impersonal. Be sure to explain your reasons, honestly and kindly, and if possible, let them know how much you would have liked to be there. If you are close to the couple whose invitation you\u2019ve declined, it can be a nice thought to send them a card or gift anyway, so they know that you are thinking of them despite your absence.<\/p>\n\n&nbsp;\n\n<h2>Responding without an RSVP card<\/h2>\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-image Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/5.jpg\" alt=\"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation\" class=\"wp-image-7538\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/5.jpg 1080w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/5-640x427.jpg 640w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/02\/5-768x512.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1080px) 100vw, 1080px\" \/><\/figure>\n\n<p>Today there are several ways to respond to a wedding\ninvitation. Knowing how to respond to a wedding invitation via non-traditional\nmethods is helpful knowledge, so here are the most common alternative ways:<\/p>\n\n<ul><li>Responding via a <strong>wedding website<\/strong> &#8211; Couple: try to make the website as simple and\neasy to navigate as possible. Guest: don\u2019t forget to fill in all fields (and\ndon\u2019t assume that an RSVP is less important because it\u2019s digital).<\/li><li>Responding by <strong>text message or phone call<\/strong> &#8211; Couple: if people are calling to\nrespond, remember to keep an accurate list of the \u2018yes\u2019 group and \u2018no\u2019 group to\nsave yourself the trouble of having to double check later.<\/li><li>Responding\nvia <strong>email <\/strong>&#8211; Guest: ensure you\nhaven\u2019t forgotten to answer any of the questions in the RSVP request. Wondering\nhow to decline a wedding invitation via email without coming across rude?\nFollow the invite up with a call, or add a nice personal message in the email\nto the couple, congratulating them and wishing them good luck on their big day.<\/li><\/ul>\n\n<p>For couples distributing invites via email or other digital\nformat, remember that in the internet age, most people skim read on a screen,\nso we recommend sending the group message out with the same email address you\nwant people to reply to. If the two are different, you will have lots of people\nwho won\u2019t read properly and will reply to the wrong person &#8211; adding to the\nalready busy load of a groom or bride.<\/p>\n\n<p>It\u2019s handy to be able to brush up on the minor etiquette\ndetails for a friend or family member\u2019s upcoming nuptials so now we hope that\nyou feel confident to perfectly craft your wedding invitation reply &#8211; no matter\nwhich format you\u2019re faced with.<\/p>\n\n<h2>RSVP Wording Examples for Different Scenarios<\/h2>\n\n<p>Knowing what to actually write can be the sticking point for many guests. Here are wording templates for the most common RSVP situations.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Accepting formally (paper reply card):<\/strong><br><em>Mr. and Mrs. David Chen joyfully accept<br>Number attending: 2<br>Dietary requirements: None<\/em><\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Accepting informally (digital or text RSVP):<\/strong><br>&#8220;Hi Sarah! We&#8217;re so excited &#8211; count us in, both of us. No dietary needs. Can&#8217;t wait!&#8221;<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Declining with a genuine reason:<\/strong><br><em>Ms. Emma Thompson regretfully declines. We will be traveling internationally on that date and are devastated to miss your celebration. Wishing you both a beautiful day.<\/em><\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Declining without giving a detailed reason:<\/strong><br>&#8220;Thank you so much for the invitation &#8211; unfortunately we won&#8217;t be able to make it on that date. We&#8217;re so happy for you both and can&#8217;t wait to celebrate with you another time.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Uncertain or tentative:<\/strong> Don&#8217;t send a tentative response. Mark it as a decline or reach out to the couple directly to explain the situation before the RSVP deadline. Leaving the couple in limbo is the worst option. Browse Paperlust&#8217;s <a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/browse\/wedding-invitations\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">wedding invitation designs<\/a> including RSVP card formats.<\/p>\n\n<p><em><figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"864\" height=\"1080\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/wedding-rsvp-card-being-filled-in-on-a-table-pen-and-card-fl.webp\" alt=\"wedding RSVP card being filled in on a table - pen and card flat lay showing reply format wedding stationery\" class=\"wp-image-12012\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/wedding-rsvp-card-being-filled-in-on-a-table-pen-and-card-fl.webp 864w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/wedding-rsvp-card-being-filled-in-on-a-table-pen-and-card-fl-512x640.webp 512w, https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/03\/wedding-rsvp-card-being-filled-in-on-a-table-pen-and-card-fl-768x960.webp 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 864px) 100vw, 864px\" \/><\/figure><\/em><\/p>\n\n<h2>Handling Plus Ones and Children<\/h2>\n\n<p>Two of the most common areas of RSVP confusion involve plus ones and children. Here&#8217;s how to handle each as a guest.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Plus ones:<\/strong> If the invitation is addressed to you and your partner by name, both of you are invited. If it&#8217;s addressed only to you, don&#8217;t assume a plus one is welcome &#8211; the couple has made a deliberate seating decision. If you&#8217;re unsure, call or message the couple directly before the RSVP deadline. Never just show up with someone who wasn&#8217;t invited.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Children:<\/strong> If the invitation is addressed to &#8220;The Johnson Family,&#8221; children are included. If it&#8217;s addressed to &#8220;Mr. and Mrs. Johnson&#8221; only, it&#8217;s an adults-only wedding. Don&#8217;t ask for an exception &#8211; it puts the couple in an impossible position and creates awkwardness they shouldn&#8217;t have to manage during wedding planning.<\/p>\n\n<h2>Responding to Digital Wedding Invitations<\/h2>\n\n<p>More couples are using digital RSVPs via wedding websites, and the etiquette here is simpler but still worth knowing.<\/p>\n\n<p>Respond promptly &#8211; the RSVP deadline on a digital form is just as real as a paper reply card. Fill in all required fields accurately (dietary requirements, song request, message fields). If the form asks for a message, write something genuine &#8211; it&#8217;s easier to skip than a handwritten note, but the couple will notice who bothered.<\/p>\n\n<p>If you need to change your response after submitting, contact the couple directly rather than re-submitting the form. Most wedding website platforms don&#8217;t automatically handle response changes, and a direct message prevents confusion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2>Frequently Asked Questions<\/h2>\n\n<p><strong>How do you politely decline?<\/strong><br>Respond before the deadline. Keep it brief and warm &#8211; a short sentence of genuine regret and good wishes is enough. Send a gift if you&#8217;re close to the couple.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>How long do you have to RSVP?<\/strong><br>By the deadline on the RSVP card &#8211; typically 4 to 6 weeks before the wedding. Sooner is better. Late responses create real problems for catering and seating.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>Is it rude to RSVP yes then not attend?<\/strong><br>Yes &#8211; especially close to the date. Caterers charge per confirmed head. If you have to cancel, contact the couple immediately and send a gift.<\/p>\n\n<p><strong>What does RSVP mean?<\/strong><br>&#8220;R\u00e9pondez s&#8217;il vous pla\u00eet&#8221; &#8211; French for &#8220;Please respond.&#8221; Both yes and no require a response. RSVP does not mean &#8220;only reply if you&#8217;re coming.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n<p>Wedding invitation etiquette is ultimately about respect &#8211; for the couple&#8217;s time, their budget, and the significance of the day they&#8217;ve spent months planning. Responding promptly, honestly, and warmly costs nothing and means more than most guests realize. If you&#8217;re sending invitations and want to make the RSVP process as smooth as possible, Paperlust&#8217;s <a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/browse\/wedding-invitations\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noreferrer noopener\">wedding invitation designs<\/a> include RSVP card options that make responding easy and returning the card a pleasure.<\/p>\n\n\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\">\n{\n  \"@context\": \"https:\/\/schema.org\",\n  \"@type\": \"FAQPage\",\n  \"mainEntity\": [\n    {\"@type\": \"Question\",\"name\": \"How do you politely decline a wedding invitation?\",\"acceptedAnswer\": {\"@type\": \"Answer\",\"text\": \"Respond before the RSVP deadline, not after. Decline warmly and briefly - you don't owe a detailed explanation, but a short sentence expressing regret and good wishes is appreciated. Send a gift if you're close to the couple, and reach out afterward to congratulate them.\"}},\n    {\"@type\": \"Question\",\"name\": \"How long do you have to RSVP to a wedding?\",\"acceptedAnswer\": {\"@type\": \"Answer\",\"text\": \"Respond by the deadline printed on the RSVP card - typically 4 to 6 weeks before the wedding. The sooner the better. Couples need final headcounts for catering, seating, and venue arrangements, and late responses create real logistical problems.\"}},\n    {\"@type\": \"Question\",\"name\": \"Is it rude to RSVP yes and then not attend a wedding?\",\"acceptedAnswer\": {\"@type\": \"Answer\",\"text\": \"Yes - canceling after RSVPing yes is considered poor etiquette, especially close to the wedding date. Caterers and venues charge per head based on confirmed numbers. If you genuinely cannot attend after RSVPing yes, contact the couple immediately, apologize sincerely, and send a gift.\"}},\n    {\"@type\": \"Question\",\"name\": \"What does RSVP stand for and what does it mean?\",\"acceptedAnswer\": {\"@type\": \"Answer\",\"text\": \"RSVP stands for the French phrase 'R\u00e9pondez s'il vous pla\u00eet' meaning 'Please respond.' It is a request for the recipient to confirm whether or not they will attend. Both acceptance and decline require a response - RSVP does not mean 'only respond if you're coming.'\"}}\n  ]\n}\n<\/script>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>While your response to a wedding invitation may not be as important as the bridesmaid colours or first dance song, it deserves to be done right, and the correct way can vary, depending on the situation. If you aren\u2019t sure how to reply to a wedding invitation, then continue reading to find the solution for &#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":25,"featured_media":7533,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[83],"tags":[136],"class_list":["post-7532","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-wedding-invite-blogs","tag-wedding-invitations"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v25.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation - Paperlust<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/accepting-or-declining-a-wedding-invitation\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Accepting or Declining a Wedding Invitation - Paperlust\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"While your response to a wedding invitation may not be as important as the bridesmaid colours or first dance song, it deserves to be done right, and the correct way can vary, depending on the situation. 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