{"id":24161,"date":"2026-10-21T13:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-10-21T02:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/?p=24161"},"modified":"2026-10-04T11:28:49","modified_gmt":"2026-10-04T00:28:49","slug":"bar-bat-mitzvah-invitation-wording","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/bar-bat-mitzvah-invitation-wording\/","title":{"rendered":"Bar and Bat Mitzvah Invitation Wording: Examples by Family"},"content":{"rendered":"<style>\n#post-24161 .entry-content p,\n#post-24161 .entry-content li { font-size: 20px; line-height: 1.7; margin-bottom: 20px; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content h2 { text-transform: none !important; font-size: 34px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; line-height: 1.3; margin-top: 56px; margin-bottom: 16px; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content h3 { text-transform: none !important; font-size: 22px; letter-spacing: 0.5px; line-height: 1.3; font-weight: 600; margin-top: 32px; margin-bottom: 12px; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content table { width: 100%; border-collapse: collapse; font-size: 18px; margin: 28px 0; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content th { background: #1a1a1a; color: #fff; padding: 11px 16px; text-align: left; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content td { padding: 11px 16px; border-bottom: 1px solid #eee; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content tr:nth-child(odd) td { background: #f9f9f9; }\n#post-24161 .entry-content tr:nth-child(even) td { background: #fff; }\n<\/style>\n<style data-pl-strip-css=\"v2\">.pl-shop-strip{margin:36px 0 40px;padding:20px 20px 18px;border:1px solid #e8e1d6;background:#fdfaf4;border-radius:6px}.pl-shop-strip p.pl-ss-h{margin:0 0 14px!important;font-size:18px!important;line-height:1.35!important;font-weight:600}.pl-shop-strip p.pl-ss-h a{color:#1a1a1a!important;text-decoration:none!important}.pl-shop-strip p.pl-ss-h a:hover{text-decoration:underline!important}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-g{display:grid;grid-template-columns:repeat(4,minmax(0,1fr));gap:14px}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-g.n3{grid-template-columns:repeat(3,minmax(0,1fr))}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-c{position:relative;min-width:0}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-i{display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;aspect-ratio:4\/5;background:#fff;border:1px solid #eee;overflow:hidden}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-i p,.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-i .pin-thumbnail{margin:0!important;padding:0!important;width:100%!important;height:100%!important;display:flex!important;align-items:center;justify-content:center;position:static!important;max-width:none!important}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-i img{max-width:92%!important;max-height:92%!important;width:auto!important;height:auto!important;object-fit:contain;margin:0!important;box-shadow:none!important;border:0!important}.pl-shop-strip .pin-it-permalink{display:none!important}.pl-shop-strip a.pl-ss-n{display:block;font-size:15px;font-weight:600;line-height:1.3;margin-top:8px;color:#1a1a1a!important;text-decoration:none!important;border:0!important}.pl-shop-strip a.pl-ss-n::after{content:\"\";position:absolute;top:0;right:0;bottom:0;left:0;z-index:2}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-c:hover a.pl-ss-n{text-decoration:underline!important}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-m{display:block;font-size:13px;color:#6b6b6b;line-height:1.3}@media (max-width:600px){.pl-shop-strip{padding:16px 14px}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-g{grid-template-columns:repeat(2,minmax(0,1fr));gap:12px}.pl-shop-strip .pl-ss-g.n3{grid-template-columns:repeat(3,minmax(0,1fr));gap:8px}.pl-shop-strip a.pl-ss-n{font-size:14px}}<\/style>\n<div data-canon=\"tldr-v1\" style=\"background:#f8f6f3;border-left:4px solid #c9a96e;padding:24px 28px;margin:32px 0;border-radius:2px;\">\n  <strong style=\"font-size:18px;display:block;margin-bottom:12px;\">At a glance<\/strong><\/p>\n<ul style=\"margin:0;padding-left:20px;\">\n<li><strong>Bar mitzvah<\/strong> is for a boy and bat mitzvah is for a girl; b&#8217;nai mitzvah covers two or more children.<\/li>\n<li>Send save the dates <strong>6 to 12 months<\/strong> before the date and invitations 6 to 8 weeks out.<\/li>\n<li>Put the <strong>Hebrew name, Hebrew date and Torah portion<\/strong> in front of the rabbi or cantor before printing.<\/li>\n<li>A formal card lists hosts, child, <strong>milestone phrase<\/strong>, weekday, date, time, synagogue and celebration.<\/li>\n<li>For an evening dance party or a classmates-only event, use a <strong>party only<\/strong> invitation or insert.<\/li>\n<li>Money gifts in multiples of <strong>18<\/strong> reflect chai, the Hebrew word for life.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<\/div>\n<p>You are checking the invitation draft late at night, comparing &#8220;called to the Torah&#8221; with the simpler &#8220;becomes a Bat Mitzvah.&#8221; Your friend&#8217;s card used one; the template used another. Beside the date and the synagogue name, the words have to be right.<\/p>\n<p>This bar and bat mitzvah invitation wording guide is for parents, stepparents and grandparents planning a service, a luncheon or an evening party. It explains each Hebrew term, arranges wording by family situation, and gives copyable samples for formal, modern and celebration-only cards.<\/p>\n<p>You will also find save the date wording, reply card lines and a proofing checklist so the rabbi or cantor can confirm every Hebrew line before it goes to print.<\/p>\n<div data-locale-router=\"v1\" style=\"background:#fdfaf4;border-left:3px solid #c8a165;padding:18px 22px;margin:28px 0;border-radius:2px;font-size:14px;line-height:1.7;\">\n<strong style=\"display:block;margin-bottom:8px;font-size:13px;letter-spacing:0.5px;text-transform:uppercase;color:#7a5733;\">Shop Bar Mitzvah Invitations<\/strong><br \/>\n<a data-locale-swap=\"v1\" href=\"\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\" style=\"color:#7a5733;margin-right:14px;border-right:1px solid #d8c4a8;padding-right:14px;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">Australia<\/a><br \/>\n<a data-locale-swap=\"v1\" href=\"\/us\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\" style=\"color:#7a5733;margin-right:14px;border-right:1px solid #d8c4a8;padding-right:14px;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">United States<\/a><br \/>\n<a href=\"\/gb\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\" style=\"color:#7a5733;margin-right:14px;border-right:1px solid #d8c4a8;padding-right:14px;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">United Kingdom<\/a><br \/>\n<a href=\"\/ca\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\" style=\"color:#7a5733;margin-right:14px;border-right:1px solid #d8c4a8;padding-right:14px;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">Canada<\/a><br \/>\n<a href=\"\/nz\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\" style=\"color:#7a5733;\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"nofollow\">New Zealand<\/a>\n<\/div>\n<h2>The terms that appear on the invitation<\/h2>\n<p>A boy becomes a bar mitzvah, a girl becomes a bat mitzvah, two or more boys or a mixed group become b&#8217;nai mitzvah, two or more girls become b&#8217;not mitzvah, and some congregations use b-mitzvah for a nonbinary child or for everyone.<\/p>\n<div style=\"overflow-x:auto;\">\n<table>\n<thead>\n<tr>\n<th>Term<\/th>\n<th>Who it is for<\/th>\n<th>Typical phrase on the invitation<\/th>\n<\/tr>\n<\/thead>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td>bar mitzvah<\/td>\n<td>A boy, age 13<\/td>\n<td>called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>bat mitzvah<\/td>\n<td>A girl, age 12 or 13 depending on the community<\/td>\n<td>becomes a Bat Mitzvah<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>b&#8217;nai mitzvah<\/td>\n<td>Two or more children, boys or a mixed group<\/td>\n<td>are called to the Torah as B&#8217;nai Mitzvah<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>b&#8217;not mitzvah<\/td>\n<td>Two or more girls<\/td>\n<td>become B&#8217;not Mitzvah<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>b-mitzvah<\/td>\n<td>A nonbinary child, or everyone, in some congregations<\/td>\n<td>celebrates becoming a B-Mitzvah<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<p>The word mitzvah means commandment, and bar and bat mean son and daughter. The status arrives with the age, with or without a ceremony, so the service and party celebrate it. That is why an invitation can say a child becomes a Bar Mitzvah, or that he is called to the Torah as one.<\/p>\n<p>At the service many children take an aliyah, saying blessings both before and after the Torah reading. Some also chant a section from the Torah, read from the Prophets, lead parts of the prayers, or offer a short talk on the weekly portion, which is the d&#8217;var Torah. Practice differs by movement and by synagogue, so the child&#8217;s own rabbi or cantor is the best check on the service line. In Orthodox communities, for example, a girl becomes a bat mitzvah at 12 and is usually not called to the Torah; her invitation speaks of celebrating her bat mitzvah.<\/p>\n<h2>What every invitation needs<\/h2>\n<p>Start any bar or bat mitzvah invitation wording with the same practical core: the child&#8217;s name, the hosts, the milestone phrase, the weekday, date and time of the service, the synagogue or venue with its address, and what follows the service and where.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Child&#8217;s name:<\/strong> use the name the child uses socially. If the Hebrew name differs, it can go on its own optional line.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Hosts:<\/strong> name the people inviting, in a voice that fits the household. Family shape changes only this line.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Milestone phrase:<\/strong> choose &#8220;is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah,&#8221; &#8220;is called to the Torah as a Bat Mitzvah&#8221; or &#8220;becomes a Bat Mitzvah,&#8221; whichever your synagogue uses.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Weekday, date and time:<\/strong> lead with the service day, then the civil date and the start time.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Synagogue or venue:<\/strong> print the common name and street address so guests can find it without a second email.<\/li>\n<li><strong>What follows the service:<\/strong> say whether the invitation includes a luncheon, dinner, Havdalah reception or evening party, and where.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Reply date and method:<\/strong> put the RSVP deadline and contact on the reply card when the set includes one; if there is no reply card, print a single RSVP line on the main card.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Optional lines:<\/strong> add attire, Hebrew name, Hebrew date, Torah portion, donation or livestream notes only when they help guests or honor tradition.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Separate cards carry details that would crowd the main invitation: a celebration card with its own time and place, a reply card, and an insert with directions, hotels and a short guide for guests who have not been to a synagogue service. On most bar mitzvah invitations, the service and the meal directly after it share the main card, while an evening party with a separate venue gets its own card.<\/p>\n<figure style=\"margin:28px 0;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/bar-bat-mitzvah-invitation-wording-inl1-01.jpg\" alt=\"A boy in a white skullcap shakes hands with an elderly man in a navy skullcap in a bright room with round tables and blue flowers.\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" style=\"width:100%;height:auto;border-radius:2px;\" \/><\/figure>\n<h2>When to send save the dates and invitations<\/h2>\n<p>Send save the dates 6 to 12 months before the date, and mail invitations 6 to 8 weeks before the service. When many guests travel, move the invitation mailing to 10 to 12 weeks before. Set the reply date 3 to 4 weeks out, and order printed invitations 3 to 4 months ahead so the proof and printing schedule stay relaxed.<\/p>\n<div style=\"overflow-x:auto;\">\n<table>\n<thead>\n<tr>\n<th>When<\/th>\n<th>What to send or do<\/th>\n<\/tr>\n<\/thead>\n<tbody>\n<tr>\n<td>6 to 12 months before<\/td>\n<td>Send save the dates<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>3 to 4 months before<\/td>\n<td>Order printed invitations<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>6 to 8 weeks before<\/td>\n<td>Mail invitations; use 10 to 12 weeks for many traveling guests<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>3 to 4 weeks before<\/td>\n<td>RSVP deadline falls<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>Week of the service<\/td>\n<td>Confirm the service time with the synagogue office<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<tr>\n<td>After the celebration<\/td>\n<td>The child writes thank-you notes<\/td>\n<\/tr>\n<\/tbody>\n<\/table>\n<\/div>\n<p>A bat mitzvah save the date needs far less than the invitation: the child&#8217;s name, the date, the city and a note that a formal invitation will follow. Here are two short forms.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Save the date<br \/>for Maya Rosen&#8217;s Bat Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, September 14<br \/>Chicago<br \/>Invitation to follow<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Please save the date<br \/>for Max Gold becoming a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, November 9<br \/>Los Angeles<br \/>Invitation to follow<\/div>\n<p>A save the date is not the place for the Hebrew name, the Hebrew date or the Torah portion; those details belong on the invitation, after the rabbi or cantor has confirmed them.<\/p>\n<h2>Traditional and formal wording<\/h2>\n<p>For formal bar mitzvah invitation wording, the traditional order is hosts, request line, child&#8217;s name, milestone phrase, weekday and date, time, synagogue, and what follows. A bat mitzvah invitation uses the same structure, and the voice can stay third person throughout.<\/p>\n<p>Formal wording often includes a request line such as &#8220;request the honor of your presence&#8221; because this is a religious milestone. Keep the service details exact; the celebration card can carry a more relaxed voice later if the party is separate.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Daniel and Rebecca Halpern<br \/>request the honor of your presence<br \/>as their son, Jacob Samuel Halpern,<br \/>Yaakov Shmuel ben Daniel v&#8217;Rivka,<br \/>is called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, October 12<br \/>at nine thirty in the morning<br \/>Temple Emanuel<br \/>Kiddush luncheon to follow<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Alison and Mark Feld<br \/>invite you to share in their joy<br \/>as their daughter, Hannah Rose Feld,<br \/>becomes a Bat Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, June 8, at ten in the morning<br \/>Congregation Beth Am<br \/>Kiddush luncheon to follow<br \/>RSVP by May 18<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Mia and Josh Berk<br \/>request the pleasure of your company<br \/>as their son, Ethan David Berk,<br \/>will chant from the Torah and become a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, January 23<br \/>15 Shevat<br \/>Parashat Beshalach<br \/>at nine o&#8217;clock in the morning<br \/>Beth Shalom<br \/>Lunch to follow<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Carol and Steven Adler<br \/>invite you to the Bat Mitzvah of<br \/>Lila Miriam Adler<br \/>granddaughter of Ruth and Joseph Sacks<br \/>and of Shirley Katz of blessed memory<br \/>Saturday, May 4, at ten thirty<br \/>Temple Sinai<br \/>Kiddush to follow<\/div>\n<p>For the stationery itself, browse <a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\">Paperlust bar and bat mitzvah invitations<\/a>, which are personalized online. The designer sends a free digital proof, and you approve it before printing starts; methods include digital, flat foil, letterpress, foil stamp and white ink, so the card can match the formality of this wording.<\/p>\n<div class=\"pl-shop-strip\" data-pl-strip=\"24161-01\">\n<p class=\"pl-ss-h\"><a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/browse\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\">Browse bar and bat mitzvah invitation designs &rarr;<\/a><\/p>\n<div class=\"pl-ss-g\">\n<div class=\"pl-ss-c\">\n<div class=\"pl-ss-i\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.paperlust.co\/uploads\/design\/2728\/thum_\/turquoise.jpg\" alt=\"Turquoise bar &amp; bat mitzvah invitation design from Paperlust.\" width=\"365\" height=\"512\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" \/><\/div>\n<p><a class=\"pl-ss-n\" href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/design-cascade\/3645\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations--metallic-prints--turquoise-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\">Turquoise<\/a><span class=\"pl-ss-m\">Metallic<\/span><\/div>\n<div class=\"pl-ss-c\">\n<div class=\"pl-ss-i\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.paperlust.co\/uploads\/design\/2730\/thum_\/watercolourstripes.jpg\" alt=\"Watercolour Stripes bar &amp; bat mitzvah invitation design from Paperlust.\" width=\"512\" height=\"365\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" \/><\/div>\n<p><a class=\"pl-ss-n\" href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/design-cascade\/3650\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations--digital-printing--watercolour-stripes-bar-mitzvah-invitations\/\">Watercolour Stripes<\/a><span class=\"pl-ss-m\">Digital printing<\/span><\/div>\n<div class=\"pl-ss-c\">\n<div class=\"pl-ss-i\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.paperlust.co\/uploads\/design\/2814\/thum_\/theday178mmx127mm.jpg\" alt=\"The Day bar &amp; bat mitzvah invitation design from Paperlust.\" width=\"512\" height=\"718\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" \/><\/div>\n<p><a class=\"pl-ss-n\" href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/design-cascade\/3778\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations--digital-printing--the-day-bar-bat-mitzvah-invitations\/\">The Day<\/a><span class=\"pl-ss-m\">Digital printing<\/span><\/div>\n<div class=\"pl-ss-c\">\n<div class=\"pl-ss-i\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/assets.paperlust.co\/uploads\/design\/2746\/thum_\/simplicity_barmitzvahcobaltfront.jpg\" alt=\"Simplicity bar &amp; bat mitzvah invitation design from Paperlust.\" width=\"512\" height=\"370\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" \/><\/div>\n<p><a class=\"pl-ss-n\" href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/design-cascade\/3667\/bar-&#038;-bat-mitzvah-invitations--white-ink--simplicity-bar-mitzvah-invitations\/\">Simplicity<\/a><span class=\"pl-ss-m\">White ink<\/span><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<h2>Modern and casual wording<\/h2>\n<p>Casual bat mitzvah invitation wording still names the same details: the child, the milestone, the service time, the place and what comes next. The voice simply sounds warmer and closer to how your family talks. A child&#8217;s voice still needs a complete set of details, so even a short card must give the day, time, place and celebration. A very short card works when a separate reply card and celebration card carry the rest, or when the guest list is small and everyone already knows the schedule. For a late Saturday afternoon Havdalah service, name the Havdalah moment and the party that follows it.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Lena and Tom Brennan<br \/>invite you to celebrate as their daughter,<br \/>Ava Brennan,<br \/>becomes a Bat Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, September 21, at ten thirty<br \/>Temple Beth Or<br \/>Brunch and dancing to follow<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">I&#8217;m Owen Platt,<br \/>and I get to become a Bar Mitzvah!<br \/>Come cheer me on:<br \/>Saturday, March 9, at nine<br \/>Congregation B&#8217;nai Israel<br \/>Tacos and music after<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Noah Stein becomes a Bar Mitzvah.<br \/>Saturday, November 16, ten in the morning<br \/>Shaarei Shalom<br \/>Party to follow<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">As Shabbat ends, we will gather for Havdalah<br \/>and to celebrate Ruby Kessler becoming a Bat Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday evening, February 8, at five thirty<br \/>Temple Beth El<br \/>Dinner and dancing to follow<\/div>\n<figure style=\"margin:28px 0;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/bar-bat-mitzvah-invitation-wording-inl2-01.jpg\" alt=\"A woman in a white shirt and a girl in a blue top seal cream envelopes at a wooden table with pale blue ribbon and blue and white flowers.\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" style=\"width:100%;height:auto;border-radius:2px;\" \/><\/figure>\n<h2>Wording for different families<\/h2>\n<p>For blended, interfaith, LGBTQ+ and other family shapes, only the host line usually changes. The milestone phrase, service details and celebration line stay the same. Choose the wording that names your child&#8217;s real family, and let the rest follow the invitation format you already like.<\/p>\n<h3>Divorced parents hosting together<\/h3>\n<p>When divorced parents share the day, put each parent&#8217;s name on a separate line without a connecting &#8220;and.&#8221; Check that both names appear as the child knows them.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Sarah Winter<br \/>Michael Hale<br \/>invite you to celebrate as their son,<br \/>Eli Jonah Winter,<br \/>will be called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, April 6, at ten<br \/>Ohr Shalom<br \/>Kiddush luncheon to follow<\/div>\n<h3>A remarried parent with a stepparent named<\/h3>\n<p>When one parent has remarried, list each household on its own line: the parent and stepparent together, then the child&#8217;s other parent alone. That keeps the relationships clear without a block of names.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Rachel Walsh and Peter Cole<br \/>with Emma&#8217;s father, David Shore<br \/>invite you to the Bat Mitzvah of<br \/>Emma Rose Shore<br \/>Saturday, August 10, at ten thirty<br \/>Temple Beth Israel<br \/>Lunch and celebration to follow<\/div>\n<h3>A single parent<\/h3>\n<p>A single parent can host under one name, or add a warm line about the whole family&#8217;s joy.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Luisa Torres<br \/>invites you to celebrate her son,<br \/>Gabriel Andres Torres,<br \/>as he becomes a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, May 11, at nine thirty<br \/>Congregation Sinai<br \/>Luncheon to follow<\/div>\n<h3>Two moms or two dads<\/h3>\n<p>Use both parents&#8217; names exactly as the family does, with no special explanation needed.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Ellen and Kara Quinn<br \/>ask you to share their joy<br \/>as their daughter, Sadie Rae Quinn,<br \/>becomes a Bat Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, June 22, at ten<br \/>Temple Shir Hadash<br \/>Celebration to follow<\/div>\n<h3>An interfaith family or guests new to the synagogue<\/h3>\n<p>Keep the wording warm and clear for guests who may not know service customs. The card can offer a guide insert rather than explaining everything on the card, and a welcoming line can help every guest feel included.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Jenna and Paul Whitfield<br \/>request the pleasure of your company<br \/>as their son, Sam Whitfield,<br \/>celebrates becoming a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, October 5, at ten thirty<br \/>Temple Beth Emeth<br \/>A short guide to the service is enclosed<br \/>Lunch and celebration to follow<\/div>\n<h3>Twins, siblings or friends sharing the day<\/h3>\n<p>For two or more children, b&#8217;nai mitzvah fits boys or a mixed group, and b&#8217;not mitzvah fits two or more girls.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Naomi and Nathan Rosenfeld<br \/>invite you to celebrate as their children,<br \/>Zoe and Levi Rosenfeld,<br \/>become B&#8217;nai Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, November 23, at nine thirty<br \/>Congregation Rodef Sholom<br \/>Kiddush lunch and party to follow<\/div>\n<h3>A nonbinary child<\/h3>\n<p>Some congregations use b-mitzvah, b&#8217;mitzvah or bet mitzvah, and they and them in the wording. Ask your rabbi or cantor which form your synagogue uses.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">The Rivera family<br \/>invites you to celebrate as their child,<br \/>Sol Rivera,<br \/>becomes a B-Mitzvah<br \/>They are preparing their Torah portion<br \/>and hope you will be there<br \/>Saturday, January 11, at ten<br \/>Beth Chayim<br \/>Kiddush luncheon to follow<\/div>\n<h3>An adult bar or bat mitzvah, self-hosted<\/h3>\n<p>An adult can host the invitation themselves, using the same milestone language and adding a line about the study or service.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">I&#8217;m Jordan Meyer,<br \/>and I invite you to celebrate my becoming a Bar Mitzvah<br \/>Saturday, March 15, at ten<br \/>Kehillat Lev Shalem<br \/>Study, service and lunch to follow<\/div>\n<h2>Service and celebration: one card or two<\/h2>\n<p>Use one card when every guest is invited to the service and everything after it. Use a separate celebration card when the party has its own time, place or guest list, such as a party only invitation for the child&#8217;s classmates after a morning service.<\/p>\n<p>The celebration card travels in the same envelope as the main invitation. That way each household sees which events their group is invited to without receiving two mailings. If classmates are invited to the party, they are welcome at the service too; a sentence on the insert can tell parents that the ceremony is open to all.<\/p>\n<p>A morning service often leads to a luncheon line like &#8220;Kiddush luncheon to follow&#8221; on the same card. For a party after Shabbat ends, list the celebration on its own card with a start time after Havdalah. Guests need to know whether they should arrive for the close of Shabbat or only for the meal and dancing. If the family marks Shabbat more observantly, music and dancing wait until Shabbat has ended, so the card should give the evening start time as the moment guests may arrive.<\/p>\n<p>For an Orthodox bat mitzvah, practice differs: the girl is usually not called to the Torah, so the wording speaks of celebrating her bat mitzvah, often at a festive meal or a party where she may give a d&#8217;var Torah.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Zachary Miller<br \/>will become a Bar Mitzvah at morning services.<br \/>Please join us for dinner and dancing in his honor<br \/>Saturday evening, October 26, at seven<br \/>The Lakeview Room<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Hey friends,<br \/>the service comes first, and afterward it is time to party with Sophie.<br \/>Sunday, September 22, from noon to three<br \/>Riverside Gymnasium<br \/>Pizza, games and a sundae bar<br \/>RSVP by September 8<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">You are invited to a Bat Mitzvah party for<br \/>Sasha Rubin<br \/>Sunday, May 19, from four to seven<br \/>The Maple Room<br \/>Dessert, dancing and an art project<\/div>\n<figure style=\"margin:28px 0;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/blogcdn.paperlust.co\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/bar-bat-mitzvah-invitation-wording-inl3-02.jpg\" alt=\"A smiling boy in a white kippah sits on a wooden chair lifted by men in dark suits above a dance floor with blue and white flowers.\" width=\"1080\" height=\"720\" data-no-lazy=\"1\" style=\"width:100%;height:auto;border-radius:2px;\" \/><\/figure>\n<h2>Optional lines and the reply card<\/h2>\n<p>Optional lines earn their place when they carry tradition or make the day easier for guests. Add only what your guests need, and let the reply card handle names, the number attending and any meal choice.<\/p>\n<h3>Hebrew name and Hebrew date lines<\/h3>\n<p>A Hebrew name line uses the format child&#8217;s Hebrew name, ben or bat, then the parents&#8217; Hebrew names joined by v&#8217;. A non-gendered option is mibeit, from the house of. The Hebrew date line sits beside the civil date and uses a day and month, not the year.<\/p>\n<h3>Torah portion line<\/h3>\n<p>The portion, or parashah, is fixed by the service date. On the card it appears as &#8220;Parashat&#8221; plus the portion name. Confirm the Hebrew spelling and the portion name with the rabbi or cantor before you approve the proof.<\/p>\n<h3>Attire and kippot<\/h3>\n<p>A line such as &#8220;Kippot will be provided&#8221; or &#8220;Dress for comfort and respect&#8221; helps guests. In the sanctuary, many guests wear a kippah as a head covering, and hosts often supply personalized ones as keepsakes.<\/p>\n<h3>A note for guests new to a Shabbat service<\/h3>\n<p>If the service is on Shabbat, a short insert can mention that phones, photos and writing are not used in the sanctuary. In observant communities, the music and party may wait until Shabbat has ended.<\/p>\n<h3>Donation and mitzvah project line<\/h3>\n<p>A gift to a cause in the child&#8217;s honor is customary, and many children choose a cause or a mitzvah project. In Jewish communities, money gifts are often given in multiples of 18 because 18 corresponds to the numerical value of chai, the Hebrew word for life. If you prefer a donation, a gentle line can point guests toward the cause your child has chosen.<\/p>\n<h3>The reply card<\/h3>\n<p>A reply card asks for names, the number attending, and a meal choice where there is one. For a kids&#8217; party, give a parent as the contact and print a pick-up time so families know when the celebration ends. If you want more samples, this <a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/rsvp-card-wording\/\">RSVP card wording examples<\/a> guide uses the same card format and adapts easily to a bar or bat mitzvah.<\/p>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">The favor of a reply is requested by May 18<br \/>_____ accepts with pleasure<br \/>_____ declines with regret<br \/>Name(s) ____________________<br \/>Number attending the luncheon ____<\/div>\n<div style=\"background:#fafafa;border-left:3px solid #ddd;padding:16px 20px;margin:20px 0;font-style:italic;\">Please RSVP by October 12<br \/>Text Talia&#8217;s mom<br \/>Number of kids attending ____<br \/>Pick-up at 4:30 p.m.<\/div>\n<h2>Proofing, printing and mailing<\/h2>\n<p>Before you approve the proof, ask your rabbi or cantor to check every Hebrew word, the portion name and the service time. This is the step that catches a transliteration error, a weekday that does not match the date, or a portion name that is not the one read on that date.<\/p>\n<p>Your proofreading list should cover the child&#8217;s name as it will be printed, all parent and stepparent names, the synagogue name and address, the weekday matching the date, service start time, celebration start time, and reply date. For Hebrew lines, confirm the child&#8217;s Hebrew name, the Hebrew date on the card, and the Torah portion exactly as the clergy gives them. Ask a detail-oriented friend to read the proof aloud too; a typo often hides in times and names.<\/p>\n<p>Order one invitation per household, plus spares for mistakes, last-minute guests and keepsakes. If you print through Paperlust, the cards are printed in Melbourne and delivered internationally, and the designer sends a free digital proof before printing starts. For the envelopes, follow this <a href=\"https:\/\/paperlust.co\/blog\/envelope-addressing-wedding-invitations\/\">addressing invitation envelopes<\/a> guide; the same etiquette applies to bar and bat mitzvah mailings, so double-check titles, street names and zip codes.<\/p>\n<p>After the celebration, the child writes the thank-you notes. A short line in their own voice, naming the gift or the guest&#8217;s presence, means more than an unsigned printed card.<\/p>\n<h2>Frequently asked questions<\/h2>\n<h3>What do you write on a bar or bat mitzvah invitation?<\/h3>\n<p>Start with the hosts and the day, time and place of the service. Then name the child, state that they are becoming a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, and say what follows. Add the reply date on the reply card, with optional lines such as the Hebrew name or dress note. Keep the card clear and let an insert carry directions or a guide for guests.<\/p>\n<h3>When should bar and bat mitzvah invitations be sent?<\/h3>\n<p>Mail invitations 6 to 8 weeks before the service. If many guests are traveling, send them 10 to 12 weeks out. Set the reply date 3 to 4 weeks before. Send save the dates 6 to 12 months ahead, and order printed invitations 3 to 4 months ahead.<\/p>\n<h3>Should the card say &#8220;bar mitzvah of&#8221; or &#8220;becomes a bar mitzvah&#8221;?<\/h3>\n<p>A card can say &#8220;becomes a Bar Mitzvah.&#8221; Many invitations also use &#8220;called to the Torah.&#8221; The title is tied to age rather than to the ceremony, so &#8220;becomes&#8221; is accurate. Use &#8220;the Bar Mitzvah of&#8221; when the invitation names the child as the honoree.<\/p>\n<h3>Does Hebrew have to appear on the invitation?<\/h3>\n<p>No. Hebrew lines are optional. Many families add a Hebrew name, a Hebrew date or the Torah portion, but you can print an entirely English invitation. If you do include Hebrew, confirm every transliteration and the portion name with your rabbi or cantor before proofing.<\/p>\n<h3>What does b&#8217;nai mitzvah mean and when should I use it?<\/h3>\n<p>B&#8217;nai mitzvah is the plural form used for two or more children, usually boys or a mixed group such as twins or siblings sharing a date. Use b&#8217;not mitzvah for two or more girls. Some congregations also use b&#8217;nai mitzvah as a gender-neutral term.<\/p>\n<h3>Can the invitation mention gifts or a donation?<\/h3>\n<p>You may mention a gift that benefits a cause the child chose, especially when there is a mitzvah project. Many families do not mention gifts at all. In Jewish communities, money is often given in multiples of 18 because 18 represents chai, the Hebrew word for life.<\/p>\n<h3>What should we tell guests who have never been to a synagogue service?<\/h3>\n<p>Include a short insert rather than crowding the invitation. Tell guests when to arrive, that phones and photos are not used on Shabbat, that a kippah will be available, and what follows the service. Explain whether the party includes music and dancing that evening or the next day.<\/p>\n<p><script type=\"application\/ld+json\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@type\":\"FAQPage\",\"mainEntity\":[{\"@type\":\"Question\",\"name\":\"What do you write on a bar or bat mitzvah invitation?\",\"acceptedAnswer\":{\"@type\":\"Answer\",\"text\":\"Start with the hosts and the day, time and place of the service. Then name the child, state that they are becoming a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, and say what follows. 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